The Cat, begins with Joan and Adam walking down the street.
Joan - Last night my mom's aunt made us chant some Indian nature prayer she learned in New Mexico.
Adam - Sounds cool.
Joan - Yeah, until you have to pose like a deer while she dances around you waving snake teeth. My dad was really happy about that.
Adam - My aunt has this big thing on her neck. It used to freak me out, like she was growing another head.
Joan - (Looking at him funny) What does that have to do with anything?
Adam - We were talking about Aunts, weren't we?
Joan - No, we were talking about me. Only 2 more days. My mom has this permanent serial killer smile glued to her face. I hope she makes it.
They walk towards a woman with a bunch of very straggly cats in cages.
Adam - Whoa. Intense. [Chuckles]
Joan - Eew. Gross.
Woman - They'll be put to sleep if they're not adopted.
Joan - Looks like they could use the sleep.
God - You could adopt one, Joan.
Joan - I hate cats. This you know.
God - They were born on the streets wild. They need a home.
Joan - How about I get a puppy? (God is silent, shakes her head.) Hamster? (God is silent, shakes her head.) Sea monkeys? (shakes)
Joan sighs and looks a the cats in the cages. One hisses at her. Cut over to the Girardi Kitchen, where a woman, Aunt Olive, is making something in the oven. She is an oldish lady (I would say late 60s or early 70s) who wears her hair short. She wears very colourful clothes.
Olive - I love the smell! Oh, the salt and the paprika bring out the flavour.
Helen - Are you sure crickets are edible? (takes them out of the oven)
Olive - Mmm. (tries one) In the Kanchanaburi province in Thailand it's a delicacy.
Helen - Well, in arcadia they're exterminated.
Olive - Oh, Helen, come on, live a little. I learned this recipe from a Thai chef who said that crickets kept him vital. Over 90-- still having sex like a rabbit.
Luke - I'll try one. (eats a cricket)
Kevin - Me, too. (eats a cricket)
Helen - Oh, god.
Olive - I don't know how you lead such a sheltered life.
Helen- Not eating bugs makes me sheltered?
Olive - I always told my sister not to coddle you so much.
Helen - Was that before or after she had to send you money to get you out of Burma?
Kevin - Could I, uh, have another one? I think I might feel a rustling down there.
Helen laughs and Joan walks in with Adam, who is caring Joan‘s cat cage.
Joan - Introducing the newest Girardi... Larry the cat. (Adam sets the cage down on the counter.)
Helen - You got a cat? (the cat yowells)
Joan - Yeah.
Olive - (looks at the cat) It's wild, isn't it?
Joan - Uh, yeah.
Olive - Get rid of it. They can't be tamed.
Joan - No, the pamphlet shows you how to domesticate them.
Kevin - Tell that to Siegfried.
Luke - No, I think it was Roy.
Olive - In central china, they would cook it in a nice spicy Szechuan sauce.
Luke - Have a cricket. Good for sex.
Helen - Luke!
Adam - I'm goin' in. (eats a cricket)
Olive - Oh, good for you.
Joan - Eew! This is like Arcadia fear factor.
Aunt Olive picks up the tray of cricks but then starts to moan and loose her balance. She drops the tray and starts to fall.
Luke - Is she ok?
Kevin -Oh my god.
Helen - (she and Joan rush and catch her before she falls) Catch her. Call 911.
Luke - What happened?
Helen - You ok? Olive? Olive? Olive? Honey?
Kevin - (On the phone) Hi, I have an emergency.
Larry yawls as they girls try to revive Olive who is on the floor. This is where we go to opening credits. When we return, we see Helen and Will talking at the hospital. Poor Girardi family.. They seem to be here a lot don’t they. Sorry, I’ll continue.
Helen - She was supposed to go to the Canary Islands next week for a silbo language class.
Will - A what?
Helen - The language is all whistling. Apparently there are over 4,000 words in--
Will - forget it. There's nothing about her that's ever gonna make any sense to me.
Pan over to Luke and Joan sitting near their parents.
Luke - Speaking of which, why would someone who has repeated claimed that she hates cats get a cat?
Joan - They were gonna kill it.
Kevin - But a cat?
Joan - I'm a puzzle, ok?
Doctor - (To Helen) You can see her now. She's stable and resting. The stroke involved the middle cerebral artery.
Helen - Oh, no.
Doctor - The good news is that this type of stroke doesn't affect mental acuity or speech. And she has certainly been talking. But she's temporarily Paralysed from the waist down.
Kevin - Temporarily? That is good news.
Doctor - She may also have some motor impairment with her right arm. Now, we're looking into temporary care facilities nearby because, well, she doesn't seem too happy to be here.
The Girardi family enters the hospital room.
Helen: Hi.
Olive - Don't look. They won't give me a brush. Or my own clothes.
Helen - We don't care.
Olive - I do! I care. (A nurse has just stuck her with a needle. We get the feeling that Olive has not been nice to this nurse, so the nurse is being a little harder on her) Ouch! My legs are paralysed. Why the hell don't you just stick me there?
Kevin - It's a blood flow issue. I--I used to ask the same thing.
Olive - (The nurse leaves) Nice chattin' with you, too... Mrs. Mengele. (Olive gets a dirty look from the nurse.. Yep.. Olive must not have been nice to her)
Olive looks at the food provided for her.
Olive - Processed juice drink. How do they expect anybody to get healthy drinking chemicals?
Joan - Aunt olive, can I get you some magazines?
Olive - No. Just want to get the hell out of here.
Helen - Soon. They said they're looking for a care facility.
Olive - Stick me with some drooling old people? Why don't they just shoot me? Give me some water. At least they can't ruin that.
Helen - Oh, sure. (pours the cup and Olive takes it in her injured hand. Helen Sighs) Why don't you use the other--
Olive - I'm...fine. (Helen nods. Olive almost gets a drink but drops the class and gets the front of her all wet)
Helen - Oh... here, I'll clean it up for you.
Olive - (Yelling) Get out!
Kevin - This happens all the time--
Olive - all of you. Get out. Get out.
They all leave her there. Later that evening, Joan is trying to work with her cat. Larry is hissing and yowling. Joan has oven mitts on. She tries to turn down the light.
Joan - Here, you-- you should like this. It has a calming effect. (Larry yowled and Joan jumps back) Calming!
Helen - Uh, why don't you put it in the garage?
Joan - No. Pamphlet says he needs Night Time sleep companionship. (She reaches into the cage and puts down the food.. Larry hisses) Any more news about aunt olive?
Helen - Uh, she threw pudding at the doctor.
Joan - Huh. Here. Larry. (She puts a shirt into the cage and Larry starts to paw at it.) Oh, you like that. Yeah. It's his "comfort object." Aww... it's like a little blankie.
Helen - Is there anything I can do? This seems like a lot of work.
Joan - No. I'm just gonna read to him. He needs to get used to a friendly human voice.
Cat in the hat. Good choice, huh? (She sits down to read) Ok, Larry. Story time. All right. "The sun did not shine, it was too wet to play, so we sat in the house all that cold, cold wet day. I sat there with sally, we sat there, we two, and I said how I wished we had something to do. (Helen leaves) Too wet to go out and too cold to play ball, so we sat in the house. We did nothing at all.”
Cut away to the Internal Affairs interview room at the station. Carlisle is eating AGAIN.
Will - Are you kidding? You're a walking pantry.
Carlisle - Chimichanga. I need something more substantial when I'm nervous.
A woman walks in.
Ms Preston - Good morning, gentlemen. Lucy Preston. (She sees Carlisle eating and does not shake his hand. Then she shakes Will’s hand and goes around to the back of the desk to sit down) This is my deputy, Chuck Winters. Let's have a seat. (Will and Carlisle do) I know how hard it is investigating one of your own and what a strain it puts on everybody.
Will - Sorry, but can we just get into it? Duncan and Simmons, good cops, pointed a finger at Undersherrif Roebuck for the Wallace fire. Roebuck pointed a finger at them. We got caught in the middle. Now, there's no way in hell that Roy Roebuck started that fire.
We're here because we don't have any choice.
Preston - Of course. We'll need detailed statements, case files on the shooting, death reports-- (Will slides over a pile of files) will there be anything else?
Preston - There always is.
Will and Carlisle leave and we go to the High school where Grace and Luke are walking in the halls, actually talking face to face.
Luke - I mean, she just-- she just sunk to the floor, you know, like, eyes wide. I--I just--I kind of shut down and just watched, like it wasn't real.
Grace - Dude, weird.
Luke - That's it? "Weird"? My aunt almost died and that's all you can say?
Grace - Ok, Bruce banner, relax.
Luke - Is it totally impossible for us to share things that are important to us?
Joan - Hey! You two look deep into something.
Grace - Madame curie is just trying to recruit me for the science fair again.
Luke - It's just the competition's fierce, and, you know... nodding off.
Judith - So we all into ridiculing mall-heads tonight?
Friedman - [As pepe le pew] Ooh, but of course. Meow. (he is still in love with her)
Judith - By "all" I didn't actually mean all.
Joan - Sorry, can't. Have to tame the beast with literature.
Adam - Mm. Sounds dirty. I can help.
Joan - Thanks, but I don't want my boyfriend getting scratched to death.
Judith - You don't want to be a cat person, Jo-Jo. They're antisocial, sexually frustrated introverts--
Joan - stow the Shrink-isms. I'm taking care of one of god's creatures.
Grace - Dude, we eat most of his creatures.
Judith - And your aunt eats the rest from what I hear.
Friedman - Ha ha! You're a cat on a hot tin roof. All hot and tin roof-y.
Judith - (right in his face) Friedman... you and me-- it's never gonna happen.
Friedman - I'm a scientist, my sweet. We toil in unsolvable equations for years. We like...
He leaves. Judith Groans. Later that evening back at the house. Will is just getting home and Helen is on the couch with a paper and pen.
Will - Hi.
Helen - Hi.
Will - I did something horrible today.
Helen - What?
Will - Oh, a work thing. Believe me, I'd rather have eaten the crickets. [Pouring drink] You? (asking her if she wants a drink)
Helen - Oh, yeah. Thanks.
Will - What?
Helen - I've been thinking--
Will - oh, that's when I get concerned.
Helen - I think we have to take in olive. Just until she can take care of herself again.
Will - Helen, this is a woman who stays in a motel when she visits because she doesn't approve of how we live. Let her yell at the people at the rehab place. They get paid for that.
Helen - Will-- how can you possibly think this could ever work out? I don't know. I saw Joan with that horrible cat--
Will - ok, fine, if we keep olive in a cage.
Helen - Will, the house is already set up for someone in a wheelchair. We know how to care for someone who's disabled. (Will is not buying it) She sat with my mother when she was dying, transformed the hospital room, made it look just like her bedroom at home. I... she's family. Don't we have to? "
Joan, upstairs is reading to Larry.
Joan - “A kiss, when all is said and done, what is it? A rosy dot on the I in loving. A secret that to the mouth, not ear, is whispered.” [Sighs] That's sad. She loved Cyrano but never knew. The nose really was gross, so maybe it was for the best. [Purring] Are you purring? God, you-- you're purring. (Joan gets close to the cage) Larry, we're friends now, right? "Speak to me of love, o sweet one." (Larry sticks out a paw and claws her right on the nose. She drops down to the ground) Oh! Ow! [Hisses] Ow.
Next morning in the Kitchen, Kevin is working on a cross work and comes downstairs and is right away drilled for the puzzle.
Kevin - Hey. 5-letter word for Spenser's fire.
Luke - Flame.
Kevin - Nope. (Joan comes in, blue bandage on her nose) Tough day at the zoo?
Joan - My stupid English teacher assigned Cyrano.
Kevin - (wonders, what does that have to do with her nose) I need more.
Helen - Morning.
Will - Good morning.
Kevin - Morning smiles. Never good.
Helen - Ok, well, let's just get right down to it. Dad and I are inviting aunt Olive to come live with us.
Joan - (almost spits out her Snapple) Here?
Will - What happened to your nose?
Luke - Her cat has a problem with Edmond Rostand.
Will - Why do I ask?
Joan - Aunt olive is gonna use the bathroom and everything?
Helen - It's just until she's well enough to be on her own. Oh, and, Joan, honey--
Joan - no, no, no, no. No "Joan, honey." You're gonna have to get rid of the cat.
Joan - What? Larry? If I give him back, they'll kill him.
Will - Oh, I think they could find another person for him to attack.
Joan - No, it has to be me.
Helen - Why?
Joan - It just does. It--
Helen - Aunt Olive hates cats, and it's gonna be hard enough as it is. Look, we all have to give up something.
Joan - But he started purring.
Helen - I'm sorry, honey.
Joan - [Sighs] I hate her! (Yelling and storming out) I hate aunt olive.
Luke - Wrath. (the puzzle)
Kevin - Yo.
Commercial break. When we return, Joan is walking past an outdoor basketball court. The boys playing accidently shoot the ball over the fence.
God - Sorry about that, Joan.
Joan - Getting a little exercise, huh?
God - Everyone needs exercise.
Player: Yo, Mike, Throw us the rock (God has an actual name)
Joan - Mike? Look, I'm angry with you.
God - I get a lot of that.
Joan - Pawning off cats on people who can't keep them? That's nice.
God - Yeah, it's a bummer when we have to give up things we care about.
Joan - I have to give him back. Larry could die.
God - But he's your responsibility.
Joan - What am I supposed to do? (God shrugs and then goes back to join the game. He gives his famous wave) What?
Into the school, Joan is walking with Grace and Judith.
Joan - [Sighs] He's the most lovable little kitten guy.
Judith - Yesterday you said he was like a section 8 demented chain-saw killer.
Grace - And I gotta say the nose is not a good sales tool.
Joan - (puts her hand to her nose) Ok, that was my fault. I was using the pamphlet. But he is so sweet an furry.
Judith - I can't even take care of myself.
Friedman - Judith! Judith!
Judith - Sorry. Gotta go.
Joan - Grace?
Grace - I can barely tolerate people.
Joan - Great!
Helen and Adam come out of a class room.
Adam - But I don't do pop art.
Helen - How do you know if you won't even try? You need to explore different styles and techniques.
Adam - But I know what I like. Why should I have to sacrifice my artistic integrity?
Helen -The only thing you are sacrificing, Adam, is your grade. Just do the assignment. (To Joan) Hi, honey. Did you find someone to take Larry?
Joan - No. (Helen leaves) Look who cares.
Adam - Your mom's driving me nuts with this pop art assignment. This is...
Joan - try sharing the same DNA with her.
Adam - You know, uh... come here. If you haven't found anyone to take care of Larry, I can.
Joan - Oh, but your dad's allergic.
Adam - I'll keep him in the shed.
Joan - Thanks. But the pamphlet says he needs to sleep with someone in the same room at night.
Adam - Well, I fall asleep working out there all the time anyway.
Joan - Really?
Adam - Yeah.
Joan - (gives him a kiss on the cheek) Oh, thank you so much. Thank you. He's so sweet. That's a lie, but thank you.
Later that afternoon at the Girardi house. Helen is wheeling in Aunt Olive.
Helen - Ok, here we are. Little bump over the threshold.
Olive - All right. I'm fine. I can take it from here. (She starts to wheel away, but Helen grabs the back of her chair)
Helen - Oh, you'll be in the den. Right ahead. Everything's wheelchair accessible, and we're used to taking care of Kevin, so we can help you out of bed, getting dressed.
Olive - I will find a way to dress myself.
Helen - I know you like Africa, so... I found the--the blanket at a crafts store. It's from Nigeria.
Olive - (looking around) Well, I guess it's better than the hospital. At least you people aren't trying to kill me.
Helen - They weren't trying to kill you, Olive.
Olive - The doctors parading in and out of my room... no one talking to each other. Look at all the pills they gave me. (She takes a HUGE bag of pill containers out of her bag) Look. Blood thinners, painkillers, antidepressants-- insanity. (She throws them out)
Helen - You can't just throw them away. (She takes them out of the trash and puts them in a drawer near the bed) Your neurologist said that you have to take--
Olive - he is 12. I need an herbalist. I'm gonna call Dr. Chin in San Francisco.
Helen - Well, you might want to talk to your neurologist about that.
Olive - Always afraid of doing the wrong thing, aren't you, Helen? Why are you so scared? Sometimes don't you want to just shove some stuff in a bag and take off?
Helen - I have a family.
Helen leaves and shuts the door. Cut to Joan and Adam in Adam’s garage. Joan is teaching Adam to take care of the cat. Adam is not really paying attention.
Joan - Oh, and wipe him with lukewarm cotton balls if he gets snarky, which he pretty much always is. It's soothing. And dangerous.
Adam - Ok.
Joan - And when you're not around, leave the radio on. He likes oldies.
Adam - Jane, it's all in the pamphlet. I promise I'll take really good care of him.
Joan - I know. I just... I've only had him for a few days, and we're really making progress, right, Larry? Larry. Pss pss pss pss. (Larry takes a swing at her) [Sighs] His scratching has become less violent.
Adam - Cool.
Joan - (looking at his art) Pickle jar?
Adam - Does it say "pop art" to you?
Joan - Definitely.
Adam - I'm just gonna take an "F." (He walks over to the cage and sticks his hand in and starts to pet Larry)
Joan - Oh, no, no, no, no, don't do that. He'll scratch. (He rolls over onto his belly and lets Adam pet him) Why isn't he scratching?
Adam - He likes me.
Joan - Why?
Adam -I don't know.
Joan laughs a little and we cut to the station. Roebuck was just talking to Preston. They shake hands and she leaves. Will comes over.
Will - [Speaking softly] Listen, Roy... you know I don't really think you had anything to do with that fire?
Roebuck - An accusation was made. You had to check it out.
Will - Exactly. It's just procedure.
Roebuck - But don't say you didn't think it could be me. Otherwise you would have given me a heads-up that you were going to I.A.
Will - Roy--
Roebuck - let's just all support this investigation.
Later that night. Olive is looking at a photo album in the den and Joan comes in.
Joan - Hey. What's that?
Olive - Oh, I don't know. I was bored. I pulled it off the shelf. Nothing on TV. Just some woman who had her face lifted so high, her lips are on her forehead.
Joan - Hmm. I haven't seen these in forever. (Pointing at pictures) Luke fat. Me fat. Kevin fat. What's with babies?
Olive - What do you want?
Joan - Uh, mom said that I should see if you need anything.
Olive - Legs. And a plane ticket.
Joan - (pointing out another picture) Look. Mom and dad. They were so young and happy.
Olive - I've seen it.
Joan - So mom said you were married once.
Olive - Yeah. He drowned. On our honeymoon. (Wow.. Harsh. I can’t tell if she is being dramatic or if this is true)
Joan - I'm sorry.
Olive - Oh, don't be. I never went home after that. I just took off. Lived my life.
Joan - Were you gonna have kids?
Olive - No. You think I'm odd, not having kids?
Joan - No.
Olive - You need to... discover the world on your own terms. Every choice your own. I'm tired.
Joan - Sure. (She leaves)
Joan goes right to Luke’s room. He is on-line. Talking to Grace, who’s screen name is black widow_4_U. This distracts Luke from his conversation with Joan. I’ll put Grace’s instant messages in Italics.
Luke - Yes?
Joan - [Sighs] Mom and dad were really in love when they met.
Grace - Hey
Luke - Excuse me?
Joan - Love Love. I mean, mom and dad--
Luke to Grace - Hey Grace.
Joan - Do you think we'll ever find love like that, or will we just end up like aunt Olive?
Grace - Don’t use my name on line, DUDE!!!
Luke to Joan - This isn't a good time.
Joan - Luke, you're my brother. I'm trying to talk to you about something important.
Luke - I know, but...
Luke to Grace - Right, sorry. I can’t do anything right.
Joan - if we can't have a real conversation, then what kind of relationship do we have?
Luke to Joan - Why is this happening now?
Joan - Because I have feelings. I'm not just some high school cyborg like you--
Grace - Look, sometimes I’m a jerk. It’s just there are things I don’t tell people. I can’t. (next message) It’s why I don’t let anyone come to my house.
Joan - hey.
Luke to Joan - What?
Joan - (goes to look at his computer so he has to close up instant messenger without saying good bye) Porn? Are you looking at porn?
Luke - No.
Joan smacks him in the back of the head. At Grace’s house, she is staring at the flashing instant messenger program that says “Gravity_Boy has logged off”. Of course, she doesn’t know what just happened. She thinks that she has just opened up (or almost opened up) to Luke and he is running away. She closes the lap top slowly.
We cut to Girardi dinner. Kevin is looking at the picture of Helen and Will.
Kevin - Why would you ever think this was a good look?
Will - I saved those shirts. Paisley will come back.
Joan - Maybe when everyone's blind. I can't believe you're not interested in this, Luke.
[Softer] Maybe if they were naked.
Luke - I was working.
Helen - (With a huge smile) We had just been at navy pier. It was the night we got engaged. It was...freezing. (To Will) Remember? You were shivering.
Will - Shivering? I was shaking. I didn't know if you'd say yes. I thought you were too pretty for me. (he puts down aunt Olive’s plate in front of her) And you still are. (They kiss)
Joan - Unh! Eating!
Olive - What is this?
Kevin - Chicken. It happens a lot around here. The name girardi causes fear and trembling in the chicken world.
Olive - It's cut into little pieces!
Helen - Oh, well, I thought--
Olive - what am I, some sort of helpless baby? Why don't you chew it up and spit it in my mouth like a little bird? I'm certainly capable of eating by myself. (She takes a chicken leg off Kevin’s plate and starts to eat right from the bone) See? I'm not dead yet.
Helen - Olive, we just wanted to--
Olive - call Dr. Chin. Tell him I can't live with you people hovering over me like this. (Her breaks are stuck)
Helen - Here, let me help you.
Olive - Don't touch me!
Helen - You ungrateful bitch! If our turning our lives upside down to care for you is not enough for you, then fine. You go to your Chinese doctor. But I'll tell you something. You better leave before he gets to know you. (She leaves, there is an akward look around the table as Olive tries to work with her chair. Will gets up to go to Helen. Olive is still having trouble so Kevin gives her a push. Kevin gets a smack on the hand.)
Joan - (It is a very still moment, except for the Smile you can see spreading on Joan’s face. I was looking at her, wondering what was happening.. And then… Very quietly to Kevin and Luke) In the pamphlet, that's a big no-no.
They all crack up. LOVE this moment because to me, we get a look at the behind the scenes of the show. Watch Luke’s face as Joan leans over. He is almost laughing. (You can tell by the way he shook).. Then Joan starts to say something and both boys crack up. Just wonder how many times it took them to get through that scene without screwing it up with laughter. Very cool. While I’m outside the episode and talking about the show in general… Bravo Cast and Crew!!! Ok.. Tangent over.
Here we had another commercial break. When we come back Helen and Will are getting ready for bed.
Helen - Ohh...I asked her to stay with us. How could I talk to her like that?
Will - The doctor said the stroke wouldn't affect her mental acuity or speech. What did you expect?
Helen - Well, I expected to not yell at an old lady who just had a stroke. I called her a bitch.
Will - I know. I almost cheered.
Helen - [Sighs] I'm just so tired of hearing about how great her life is. Do you remember what we talked about that night?
Will - We were gonna go to Paris for a year. You were gonna paint during the day and take classes at night.
Helen - And you were gonna study cooking and learn French. Would you change anything?
Will - Just Kevin.
Helen and Will stand by the mirror and we cut to Joan going downstairs at night. She hears aunt Olive grunting and goes to the den where she sees aunt Olive trying to pull herself into bed with her one good hand.
Joan - Aunt olive, do you need some help?
Olive - I can do it.
Joan - Well...since I'm here... (She comes into the room) I used to help Kevin, so... here, put your arms around me.
Olive - I'm not kevin. Ohh.
Joan - I know. Just...there you go. Ok.
Olive - (After Joan had tuckered her in) Ah.
Joan - Do you... do you need anything--
Olive - just sleep. Good night.
Joan - Good night.
Olive - (Throws the blankets so that Joan cant see her) Ohh...
She starts to cry and then even louder. Joan thinks about going back in to her, but decides against it. The next day at school. Luke is walking. Grace sees him and speeds up to talk.
Grace - Gravityboy has logged off? (She’s hurt by that)
Luke - Joan was trying to bust me for looking at porn.
Grace - You were looking at porn while we were on--
Luke - no! Do you-- do you want me to? (Grace has an odd smile) Look, the Joan interruption was a singular event, ok? If there's something you need to say...
Grace - (Walking a little faster so it doesn’t look like they are together, she goes to talk to Joan, who is hanging over Adam) checking your boyfriend for injuries, Girardi?
Adam - No. Larry's been good. Really.
Joan - Because I did such a good job of getting him ready to be good.
Luke - See, I find the "loosen the cap" theory unsound. I mean, if it were loosened sufficiently--
Joan - bye.
Friedman - (to Judith) Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Judith - Please don't.
Friedman - Thou art more lovely and more temperate--
Judith - (To Luke) skipper! Your little buddy.
Friedman - Rough winds to shake the darling buds of may...
Judith - forget it, Friedman.
Friedman - And summer's lease hath all too short a date. Sometimes to hot the eye of heaven shines...
Judith - I'm never, ever, ever going out with you.
Friedman - But thy eternal summer shall not fade nor lose possession of that fair thou owest: Nor shall death brag thou wanderest in his shade, when in eternal lines to time thou growest. (Judith looks over at Joan who just laughs, she Looks back at Friedman) So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see, so long lives this, and this gives life to thee.
Judith - Memorize hamlet and it's a date.
Friedman - The part or the whole play?
Judith - The play.
Friedman - (Jumping) Yes! Oh, my god.
Judith looks at Joan again and she just shakes her head.
Cut away to the station where Duncan and Simmons are in hand cuffs being lead out of the station. Will stands on the side lines watching.
Duncan - This is ridiculous. You guys got it wrong, so wrong. You gotta be kiddin' me.
Simmons - You're barking up the wrong tree here.
Ms. Preston walks by and Roebuck looks at Will and goes into the office. Cut to Adam and Larry in the Garage. Joan has just come in.
Joan - [Door closes] Hey, boys.
Adam - Hey.
Joan - (Larry yawls) Larry. (Then directed at Adam’s painting, with pictures of Larry on it) Larry. (She is surprised) Look. (To Adam) You're sick, but I like it.
Adam - Thanks. Yeah, Larry totally inspired me.
Joan - Are you a little feline inspiration? Hmm.
Adam - I've been looking at all these Andy Warhol paintings and they're amazing. I was being such a thud about it and giving your mom a hard time.
Joan - Hmm. Well, I don't know about the art, but please don't stop giving my mom a hard time. (To Larry) Hi. (He yawls again) What have you been telling him about me?
Adam - Huh. (He opens he cage)
Joan - Whoa, whoa, oh. Gloves, gloves, gloves.
Adam - (takes Larry out of the cage) No, no, no, it's ok. Come here. (Adam pecks kisses on Larry‘s head and puts him down. Larry rubs against Adam‘s legs)
Joan - Wow. That is, like, so advanced. You're practically off the pamphlet.
Later on, Olive is in the Girardi Kitchen. She is trying to get away from the table but her breaks are stuck. Kevin comes in.
Olive - [Grunting]
Kevin - Try pulling back on both bars. (Olive glares) Staying there for the rest of your life is another choice.
Olive - I didn't know where the... damn stupid light switch was. I just couldn't see. (Kevin switches on the light and Olive goes to the Fridge but can‘t open it because she has to sit in front to open it but then her chair is in the way.)
Kevin - What are you looking for?
Olive - Guava juice.
Kevin - (Goes to the fridge, gets out her juice, goes to the table, pours her a drink) Here. Uh, left hand, remember?
Olive - So how do you get used to it? (Puzzled look from Kevin) Asking for help.
Kevin - Mm.... you just... have to. When I got home from the hospital, my mom had to wash me and put me into bed. I hated it. I couldn't wait to do things for myself. But, uh... then I saw how much she was dealing with... and helping me, I don't know, connected us. Sometimes even after I could do things by myself, I'd pretend I still needed her. It was like giving her something. You might just think that this happened to you, but it didn't.
Olive - I don't think I've ever wanted anything from anybody.
Kevin - That can't be true.
Olive - You don't know me.
Kevin - I know you visit us every few years. You travel thousands of miles to see us. You must want something.
I think he reached her, because at that moment she looked so soft. Cut to a commercial break. The next morning, Helen is coming downstairs to the smells of a meal already being made.
Helen - Family member cooking who's not me. I like it.
Olive - [Chopping] Dr. Chin said I need spicy food.
Helen - I would have helped you.
Olive - Oh, I've made it a million times. I can manage.
Helen - Smells good.
Olive - Of course. It's my paella.
Olive goes over and tries to reach the Garlic that is just a little too high.
Helen - (Very timid) C-can I...
Olive - Please. (As Helen hands her the Garlic, Olive holds her hand and puts it close to her face, the closest thing to a Hug that they could ask for or handle right now. Helen gets the message) And the cast-iron skillet.
Helen - Ok. Ok. Um... I thought no one was supposed to know this recipe.
Olive - Yeah, well, it can't die with me. It's too damn good. Quick! Before the onions burn, chop 3 cloves fine. Has to be very fine. And then 6 more cloves whole, but peeled. If the onions burn we have to start over.
Upstairs, Luke is getting dressed. His computer buzzes to tell him he has a message. He has one leg on and one off, but he rolls over the bed to answer anyways.
Grace - My mother drinks
And then just as quick Blackwidow-4-u has signed off.
Luke is floored.
Back downstairs.
Olive - Mmm! Muy bueno. Take it off the stove and put it on the table.
Joan - So, if mom gives up the recipe, we have to kill her?
Olive - Yeah. Trampled by bulls. Kevin, pour the guava juice. It'll cut the spice and nobody has to get hurt.
Will - I'm putting on my pants and my trusty garlic sensor starts going nuts.
Olive - We made paella!
Will - We?
Olive - No cracks or you don't get any.
Will - Do you really have the recipe?
Helen - You can torture me all you want. I'm not giving it up. (To Luke upstairs) Luke!
Olive - I know one usually doesn't toast with guava juice, but... [Chuckles] Well, I don't care. (She holds up the glass)
Luke - Someone cooked? In the morning?
Helen - Olive's making a toast. Sit.
Luke - Sorry, I can't. Bye. (He rushes out to meet Grace)
Helen - Luke! Sorry. Oh.
Olive holds her glass. Gives each one a meaningful look with no words. Then.
Olive - Salud.
All - Salud!
Helen - Famiglia.
All - Famiglia.
Kevin - Famiglia. Mmm-mmm-mmm!
Will - Ok, who's first? Pass 'em down. Who wants a clam?
Joan - I want a shell. I want a clam shell.
Kevin - Joan spilled it.
Later at school.
The next scene is very heartfelt. I am not sure that my description will do it justice, so if you can, please see it. Even if its just the clip.
Grace is at her locker. Her face is hidden. She slams the door. Luke sees her and starts to run after her. We can see she’s been crying. Her eyes are puffy. He turns her around. She looks at him like… “I need your help… but not here”. She goes into an empty class room. He follows. They stand there, face to face, but she is not really looking at him. She shakes her head a little in disbeliefe. Then she meets his eyes. Luke puts a hand on her shoulder and pulls her into a hug. Grace starts to cry.. But not in an obvious kind of way. He is just there.. Consoling her. It is the most real I have EVER seen these two characters. And all that without even saying a word. I was wowed!
A few moments later in the Art Class.
Helen - And so Warhol forced us to look at images that had become invisible in their familiarity and proved that the potential for art exists everywhere. (The bell rings) Good job on your projects, everyone. (She stops Adam) Adam. Great job. I--I have never seen you do work that's so technically proficient. This shows a real mastery of craft.
Adam - I...I mean, it was kind of fun in the end.
Helen - That's good, 'cause... you could have a real future in commercial design. Magritte, Lichtenstein, Warhol, they all worked commercially. You can make a good living, and--and you could still do your own projects on the side. It's just something to consider.
Adam - Sure. Thanks.
To the Station. Roebuck, Ms. Preston and Will are sitting there.
Will - Roy, you can't just resign.
Roebuck - I already did. Lieutenant Preston will be taking over for me.
Will - You did this, right? You talked to Rakowski, planted some doubt about Roy.
Roebuck - She had nothing to do with this. Duncan and Simmons were my guys. They ran drugs, and they killed a woman. The buck has to stop somewhere.
Will - The buck stops wherever the person in charge decides it stops. That's the way it works nowadays.
Roebuck - And you're all right with that? You would do the same thing, will. Lieutenant Preston has been on the force for 14 years. Coming from I.A., She's unimpeachable.
Preston - I know how tough this must be. I'll leave you two alone. (To Will) We ought to grab lunch someday, detective Girardi. I might surprise you. (She leaves)
Will - (To Roebuck) I'd like to stand with you when you make the announcement.
That afternoon, Joan is going to Visit Larry at Adam’s.
Joan - Larry, look what I have. (She looks at the empty cage) What--wh...
Adam - Larry, uh... he's gone, Jane.
Joan - What happened?
Adam - He broke through the screen.
Joan Well--maybe's he's just outside.
Adam - (She goes for the door) No, no, no, no, stop. (he holds her hand and she stops) I just--I-- I've been looking for hours, ok? He's just gone.
Joan - Well, where were you? How could you have not seen him?
Adam - The pamphlet said take him out of the cage for longer periods, and he seemed really happy, so, you know, I put on music, I did some work, and... then I noticed the screen. I'm... I'm so sorry, Jane.
Joan - It's ok. It's ok. Hey. We'll--we'll find him. We'll find him.
So Joan and Adam go and put up flyers. As Joan is putting one up on a tree, she sees Helen sitting on a bench.
Joan - Mom? What are you doing here?
Helen - Aunt olive made me stop here one day to look at the birds. She said that one there-- it's blue grosbeak-- and it migrates all the way to Costa Rica for the winter. Thousands of miles. What are you doing here?
Joan - (She shows her the posters) Larry ran away.
Helen - Ohh, honey. I'm so sorry. So did aunt Olive.
Joan - What?
Helen - She, uh... she left a note.
Joan - "Tracked down Dr. Chin in Sedona. He said I'll walk once he unblocks the chi in my liver" (Joan is confused.. But Laughs) "Not one for good-byes, so I'm off. Until next time, remember, the garlic has to be finely chopped. Olive." (Handing the letter back to Helen) She should've let us give her a hug.
Helen - Next time.
Joan - Yeah. (yowling from the cats in cages) Oh, there's the cat woman. I should go tell her about Larry. I'll be back.
Joan - (to God, who has seen the poster) I lost him. I tried everything. I swear, it was just, my aunt-- he's probably under a bus somewhere, and it's all my fault.
God - Running away-- it's his nature.
Joan - But I thought I was supposed to change him.
God - Why do you think he was the one who was supposed to change?
Then we here Adam yelling “Catch him, Jane!“
Larry runs up a tree as they stand around under it calling his name. All the birds in the tree fly away and there is an African musical melody playing. This is the end of this weeks episode “The Cat”.
