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#117 : Les Dessous de Joan

En tentant d'empêcher Angela et Laurie de tyranniser la peu populaire Alice Orban, Joan est poussée, en sous-vêtements, hors du vestiaire des filles. Un moment plutôt gênant qu'Angela s'empresse d'immortaliser grâce à son téléphone portable. Adam et Grace sont prêts à prêter main forte Joan, mais Dieu lui déconseille de prendre sa revanche...

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4 - 1 vote

Titre VO
No Bad Gu

Titre VF
Les Dessous de Joan

Première diffusion
27.02.2004

Première diffusion en France
03.11.2004

Plus de détails

Scénariste : Sibyl Gardner

Réalisateur : James Hayman

 

Guests :

Derek Morgan (Sous Sheriff Roy Roebuck)
Elaine Hendrix (Mademoiselle Lischak)
Aaron Himelstein (Friedman)
April Grace (Sgt. Toni Williams)
Misti Traya (Iris)
Katerina Graham (Angela)
Lauren Storm (Lori)
Jeanette Brox (Alice Orban)
Steve Witting (Professeur de musique)
Michael Chinyamurindi (Dieu - Médecin)
John Del Regno (Dieu - serrurier)
Matthew Del Negro (Médecin urgentiste)
Andi Carnick (Emily Kerr)
Anastasia Baranova (Dieu - Etudiante en échange)
Richard Erdman (M. Walker)

In the Girls Locker Room at the high school. Joan is changing by a locker. Two popular girls (If I am not mistaken, these are the girls from The fire and the Wood and Touch Move who made fun of Joan for sicking up for Grace) are walking around the corner. In front of Joan is another girl with a hat. She is less popular.

Angela: there you are! Hey. Check this out. My dad took me shopping last night. (She shows her a cell phone she just got)

Laurie: That is so cute. What other colours does it come in?

Angela: Red, blue, tiki green. Best of all, it's a camera.

Laurie: Take one of me.

Angela: I'm still trying to figure it out.

The second girl sits down on the bench, sitting on the unpopular girls hat.

Unpopular girl: Hey, get off!

Laurie: Sorry, dr. Seuss. Don't get all Grinchy on me. (She puts on the hat) How do I look?

Angela: Unpopular.

Laurie: Excuse me. Come on, snap me.

Angela: I'm trying to-- there's so many buttons.

Unpopular girl: Can I please have my hat back?

Laurie: Why? Are your superpowers, like, leaking away?

Joan: Come on, give it a rest, you guys.

Laurie: Oh, now everybody's Grinchy.

Joan: (Takes the hat off the popular girls head and gives it back to the less popular girl) Here.

Laurie: What's wrong, did you and your biker chick break up?

Angela: Hey, I think I got it!

Joan: Hey-- (They take the picture but it gets Joan in her underwear instead of the popular girl.

Girls: ha ha ha ha! [Both laughing]

Angela: For your girlfriend's wallet?

Joan: (Laughing) Cute. Now hand it over. (Joan grabs at the camera, but they start to run.) Hey!

Girls: Let's go! Come on! (Screaming and laughing)

The girls run out into the hall. Joan, forgetting she isnt wearing anything over her underwear, runs out after them. 3 Steps out she realises what she is doing and tries to cover her self up. Too late though, several people have seen her. They start to Cat-Call at her and she goes back into the locker room.

The opening Credits and our first commercial break are here.

We come back to the show in the Girardi Kitchen.

Helen: Me of my paintings to be put into a new show at the franklin gallery.

Joan: Mm. In public?

Luke: Peer review. Bold move.

Joan: (sighs) Great. First teaching, now gallery shows. I mean, why don't you just put me on display and sell tickets?

Kevin: You're so selfless.

Helen: I'm not even sure I should be doing it. I've only been dabbling in acrylics for a few months.

Will: And they're terrific. I can't believe you didn't tell us about this.

Helen: Well, my... my compositions aren't balanced, and forget about the negative and positive face.

Will: When's the opening?

Helen: Tomorrow.

Joan: Great! Ha! Maybe you should include nude portraits of the whole family, or better yet, a series of paintings entitled, my daughter's life: A retrospective in humiliation.

Helen: Are you ok, Joan?

Joan: No. Yes. Just... the usual. Heh. School's, you know...stuff. [Muttering]

We leave and go to the high school hallway. Joan and Grace are walking.

Joan: Picture in wallet. I can't believe I did that. They weren't...

Grace: can I just say, I sort of pictured you the matching bra-and-panties type.

Joan: You picture me in my panties?

Grace: Not till I saw the photo. And my advice-- stay in school.

Joan: How'd you see it?

Grace: Spam e-mail.

Joan: Ohh...unh! I made a huge mistake when I didn't hurl that cell phone into a shower stall.

Grace: You have to nip this in the bud. People who use smiley faces in their e-mail do not deserve that much power. (they reach the lockers. Adam and Iris are standing there. She is drawing him)

Adam: Are you talking about the panty shot? [Joan Slams her head on the locker locker, Adam sighs and Iris looks at Him as if to say, WHY did you look] I deleted it, like, immediately.

Joan: This is a nightmare! An... actual nightmare that I've had in my sleep.

Adam: Uh, why do they hate you so much?

Joan: They were picking on this pathetic hat girl in the locker room. I should have just kept my mouth shut.

Grace: And your clothes on.

Iris: You stuck up for someone in gym? That's like the front lines. Kudos. Rave on.

Joan: (to Iris) Is English like a second language for you?

Adam: Chill, Jane.

Grace: What are you gonna do?

Joan: I don't know. I was thinking witness protection program.

Adam: It'll blow over.

Iris: Definite blowage.

Grace: That is not the point. An act of retaliation is in order here. And peaceful protest went out with Gandhi.

Adam: He went around naked, and he's, like, an icon. (Grace shoots him a dirty look) I'm just trying to help.

To the hospital. There has been a major disaster.

Doctor: 6 dead so far, a lot more injured. They keep coming in.

Will: All this happened in 20 seconds? How many people did he hit?

Doctor: Farmers market draws a big crowd. Apparently he plowed his car through the heart of it. (to the doctor)

Toni: We'll need his blood and urine as soon as possible.

Will: I want a breathalyzer now.

Doctor: The guy's 72. First I need to make sure he's ok.

Will: That's not my biggest concern at the moment.

Toni: Is that him?

Doctor: Just give me a second.

Will: Shrink finally gives me the green light to get back on the street and this is the first thing I see. No.

Toni: You ok?

Will: I'm horrified. And kind of pissed off. (A heart rate monitor flat lines)

Man: There he is! You bastard! You killed my wife!

Will: Hey, take it easy!

Man: Oh, no! (Crying) We have 3 children! You tell my children you killed their mother! (Sobbing)

Will: (To the doctor) Get him (the 74 year old man) upstairs to a secure room.

Back to high school. Joan slams her locker open and almost takes off a couple of fingers from the girl standing next to her.

Joan: (Gasps) Sorry. I didn't see you.

Girl: (eastern European Accent) It's all right. In my country, we are accustomed to centuries of tribal warfare.

Joan: Are you, like, an exchange student?

Girl: You might say I'm in charge of the exchange program.

Joan: That was, like, the worst German accent I ever heard.

God: Slavic, Joan. You've heard of the Balkan states?

Joan: No, not really. Is every day like Halloween for you, or...

God: I'm amused by Balkan pagan rituals. Not so much by blood-letting.

Joan: Pace, pace, we're burning daylight here. (That is an obvious reference to what the refreshment sand god sad in Night without stars)

God: Repeating myself is part of the job. (Drops accent a tiny bit) Vengeance is mine.

Joan: Ok. To be fair, you never went to high school.

God: You never went to the crusades. (She puts back her accent again) It's time for you to round out your curriculum, Joan. You know, for college.

Joan: Who can think about college at a time like this?

God: High school will end. Doesn't that cheer you up? Band rehearsal coincides with study hall. Easy excuse slip.

Joan: Band?

God: They're always hurting for percussionists.

Joan: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Am I being punished or something? I haven't even fought back yet.

God: Hitting a drum feels pretty good.

Joan: Oh, thanks, Ringo. [Exasperated sigh]

Joan goes to band. She talks to the conductor.

Conductor: Can I help you?

Joan: Hi. How do I sign up?

Conductor: Well, that depends. Who are you, and what do you play?

Joan: Um, I'm Joan Girardi, um... I play percussion...ism. Ist. (She cant figure out how to say she plays percussion, or she is a percussionist.)

Conductor: Excellent. We need someone on drums. You will pound the skins, driving the beat into our piece. Like the drummers of old who called the warriors into battle with their fierce, pounding rhythms.

Joan: Ha ha. Ok. Um... do you have the... hitting things?

Conductor: Yes, the hitting things. Uh... here you are, Joan. [Chuckles] All right. We've got 3 weeks until march-a-palooza. Are we going to rock?

There are un enthusiastic replies from the students.

Conductor: I said, are we going to rock?

All: Yeah!

Conductor: Yeah. That's more like it. Ok, let's take a crack at the new one. I think this has the Herkes spirit you'll all be down for.

Joan: Fleetwood Mac?

Unpopular girl from the locker room: No. Not when he gets through with it.

The conductor tapes the baton and Joan tries to read the music, she has it upside down. The unpopular girl turns it around.

Joan: Right. Thanks.

Conductor: Ok. From the beginning, in c, horns, you come in 2 bars late.

Joan plays the drums way out of sync.

Conductor: (stops the music) Is, uh, there an echo in here?

Joan: Heh heh. I'm sorry. I'm warming up.

Conductor: Ok. Let's try that again... together.

Joan hits the drum really hard and breaks the drum stick in half.

Joan: Uh... percussion? [Joan Mouths, Me?] That was commendably fierce, but rhythmically challenged. Take a moment to listen to the horns, find a beat--any beat-- and, uh... no flying debris. That's easy. Ok.

The others being to play and Joan just lightly taps along to the beat.

We move to Helens art show. Will is looking at a piece of art that is a triangle and a circle.

Will: It's a triangle attacking a circle. Oh, maybe the circle was rude.

Helen: It's beautifully composed. Daniel's work is very powerful.

Will: Ok. Powerful. (Helen picks up another drink) Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Easy, Picasso. The ability to stand and converse is kind of a requirement for these things.

Helen: I know. I know, I know. I'm just very, very nervous. (she sees Adam and Iris) Oh, my god, I have students here. You know, this is a really bad idea.

Critic: Miss Girardi?

Helen: Yes.

Critic: Andy Reese. (You will remember Andy from the first few days Kevin worked at the news paper. He was the one who kept putting him down) Style editor at the herald.

Helen: Oh, it's nice to meet you.

Will: Style?

Critic: Uh-huh. Do you have time for a few questions?

Helen : Questions, me? Mm-hmm. Heh heh. Um...yeah. Ok. Heh. (She picks up another drink, shes had a few too many) To style.

Across the room, Joan and Luke are looking at one of Helens paintings.

Joan: (Chuckles) Do you think that's me?

Luke: Hey, guess what? Copernicus called, said the world doesn't revolve around you.

Joan: Ohh! What a coincidence, because the dork police called, and they said they want their leader back.

Kevin: It's official, I don't miss high school anymore.

Joan sees Helen from across the room. She is laughing and snorting and Joan goes over to Will to try and help her.

(this is only heard in the back ground, I got it off the closed captions.)

Critic: Ohh!

Helen: (Snorting) Um, took a break for a while... uh-huh. Had the kids... oh, no, no, no. Didn't paint at all, except with ketchup. (Snorting)

Joan: Psst, dad. You let her have red wine?

Will: Well, I tried to steer her to the white, but I got distracted by all the arty people.

Joan: Fix it!

Helen: Oh, that is-- that is my family. (She waves)

Joan: she's starting to point us out. [Chuckling nervously]

Commercial break and we come back the next morning. The Girardi family is in the kitchen.

Helen: Anyone seen the paper? I have a faculty meeting. I want to read it before I go.

Will: Paper? Who reads the paper anymore?

Helen: I want to see if my review came out. Where is it? How bad?

Kevin: (Kevin was hiding the paper behind his back) Andy Reese is a pompous jerk, mom.

Helen: (Sighs) I'm-- I'm a big girl. (She read aloud) "As for Helen Girardi, arcadia high school's new art teacher, it is hard to imagine how this...neophyte has the courage to display her work in public, no less shape the young artistic minds of arcadia. She seems influenced by a bit of dada and, of course, cezanne, but in her callow hands, dada turns to doo-doo and the most cezanne left is..."

Kevin: it's just one lame critic's lame opinion.

Will: Hey, you want me to shoot him? 'Cause I got my gun back.

Helen: (almost crying) Just give me your gun. I'll shoot him myself. Oh, god, I--I teach class tomorrow. My kids will have read this.

Joan: Mom, no, mom, they won't. Trust me. High school kids only read under duress.

Luke: Yeah, and high school art students don't read at all.

Joan: Yeah.

Later: In the high school science class. Ms. Lischak is teaching in her usual method. She is walking up and down the rows of desks.

Ms. Lischak: And lastly... whoo! It's a yo-yo! Yo! Pretty simple to operate. Nothing to do with chemistry, right? What have we been talking about for the past 5 months, people? What about energy? (She plays with the Yo-Yo) Potential, kinetic. Potential, kinetic. Potential, kinetic.

Friedman shows Joan a copy of the Panty Shot picture and Joan gets angry.

Joan: (picks up a pencil) Potential... (Throws the pencil at Friedman) kinetic (The bell rings and she stands up quickly grabbing her books)

Joan meets Grace and Adam outside of class.

Joan: So much for nipping it in the bud. This has gone way beyond the bud.

Grace: No problem. We escalate. I vote for physical pain.

Adam: Violence begets violence, yo.

Grace: Back off, Siddhartha. You're out of their league here. You have to go for the Achille's heel: Vanity.

Joan: What, like spike their cosmetics or something?

Grace: Ask your brother what chemical cocktail would make their hair fall out.

Joan: Oh, wouldn't that involve breaking and entering? My dad's a cop.

Adam: I could whip up a cartoon. Kind of be like a social satire.

Joan: You'd do that for me?

Adam: I'd even sign it.

Grace: Yeah, the soapheads are really gonna get that. She's in her underwear, dude.

Joan: Aah-uhh!

Grace: Bad underwear.

Joan: Ok, all right!

Grace: The humiliation part is good. It has to be something doable... and very mean. Conference call tonight. We'll figure it out.

Later, with Will at the station. He is working on the case.

Roebuck: There were no skid marks. The man obviously didn't try to stop.

Will: You know how many accidents happen because people hit the gas instead of the brake? This guy wasn't on some killing rampage. Did you get the vehicle report?

Will: Brakes checked out. There was no mechanical failure as far as I can see.

Roebuck: Somebody's got to take the fall for this, will. Either the county or the man who did it.

Will: Roy--

Roebuck: There has to be a reason. Maybe he was angry about the changes to Medicare. Grieving the anniversary of his wife's death?

Will: So, if it's nothing more or less than human error, we can't allow for that?

Roebuck: Not for a mess this big.

Roebuck goes into his office and closes the door.

Back at the high school. Joan is walking down the hall and sees the girls with the cell phone.

The girls are laughing and looking at the picture.

Joan: Ohh. Is that me or some new life you're trying to ruin?

Camera Girl: We just sent it to 3 people. We can't control where it goes from there.

Joan: Is this some kind of sport or more like ambition?

Girl: Heh, psycho. Go bang your drum. (they walk away)

Joan: (calling after them) Hey, yours is coming! It's only fair!

Girls: Give it your best shot.

Joan: Ha! When you least expect it!

Near Joan there is a handy man who is trying to pull a lock off a locker.

Man: Done! The cornerstone of the practical joke. Who knew you guys would get so good at being mean?

Joan: The devil?

God: Go to the head of the class. You skip band practice this afternoon.

Joan: Why? I just started.

God: Laundry.

Joan: What?

God: Your mother's behind on laundry. Hence, the bad underwear. This you know.

Joan: Ok, and this you should know. There's seriously weird laundry rules in my house. Like mom won't let anyone touch it except for dad. He likes to do his own. But we're talking serious dysfunction.

God: Surprise her. She'll be grateful. Sometimes people need the choice taken out of their hands.

Joan: Isn't that your job?

God: No. This afternoon, it's yours. Do the laundry. (god leaves)

Joan: Ha! (Once again calls down the hall at him) You're the one who made us shamed to be naked! (turns into the corner) Ooh, I should stop doing that.

Joan tries to do laundry. Ill try to paint the best picture I can here, but if you can, see this clip for yourself, it will make my explanations a lot clearer.

So, Joan is in the laundry room. There is clothes ALL OVER the floor. She is just shoving clothes into the washer. She grabs the box of soap and looks inside. She decides to just dump the whole box into the washer. She then sits on the drier and puts her foot into the washing machine. Luke comes in here.

Luke: Luke: Oh, this is bad.

Joan: I'm doing laundry.

Luke: Mom doesn't let people do laundry.

Joan: Yeah, well, I'm taking the choice out of her hands.

Luke: You're standing in the washing machine.

Joan: I'm improvising. I can't be here all day.

Luke: That doesn't look safe.

Joan: Uh, heh heh. Like laundry is not safe? Look, when I say go, I want you to hit the on button.

Luke: Uh, what's the on button look like?

Joan: I don't know. It should say "on."

Luke: Well, it doesn't. It says "whites" or "colours."

Joan: (stands with one foot in the washer and one on the floor) Uh, both.

Luke: There's not a "both" button.

Joan: Well, hit something.

Luke: Ach, Joan, there's-- (he closes the lid and the washer starts automatically with Joans foot still inside. She is flipped upside down, hanging by her foot.

Joan: ohh! Ohh! Ohh! Luke! Oh, no! Stop! Press stop!

Luke: There's no "stop!"

Joan: Aah! Call 911! Ohh! Luke! Aah! Aah! Aah! Luke! Call 911! Uhh! Ohh! Aah!

Luke: Oh, my god!

He runs out of the laundry room, Runs a little in one direction, then back in the other, then back again. Its almost like the cant remember where the phone is.

Joan is stuck upside down. Then, the suds start to over flow the washer.

We leave to a commercial break. We come back to Joan, Luke and Helen in the hospital.


Doctor: Here, you can have this back.

Helen: Thanks.

Doctor: It's just a sprain. Keep the ice on it and stay on crutches for a couple of days.

Joan: Crutches?

Doctor: Unless you prefer hobbling.

Joan: Uh, crutches. Thank you. Great. I'm tiny Tim. (The doctor leaves the room)

Helen: Ok, to start, no one in the house touches my washing machine.

Joan: I was just trying to help. It's bad enough to be called a bad artist.

Helen: I'm not a bad artist.

Joan: I'm just saying.

Helen: Ok, Luke, what was your involvement?

Luke: I hit a button. It was scientifically unsound.

Helen: Huh! I don't want you people in my laundry room.

Joan: Mom, too little, too late. (She Points to her broken foot)

Helen: No, I feel I've been clear on this issue.

Joan: How about I meet you guys in the lobby, hmm?

Helen: Come on, Luke

They both leave and the doctor comes back in.

Doctor: You know how to use these?

Joan: I know how to make electricity from sugar.

God: No, you don't. You just memorized it for the test.

Joan: Why are you punishing me? I haven't even done anything yet.

God: Yet.

Joan: Oh, wow. So thoughts really do count.

God: Thoughts are things, Joan. And I don't punish people, you punish yourselves. Hmm. You're so good at it, I can almost retire.

Joan: Well, why don't you?

God: I like my work. You know, it might help to think of these things as distractions.

Joan: From what?

God: Yourself, ways you've been wronged.

Joan: Well, somebody has to take care of it.

God: Yes, perhaps someone who knows better than to stand in a washing machine.

Joan: Ha! You know, the more I get to know you, the less I like you. Oh, that is seriously screwed up.

God: Ibuprofen 3. The directions on the bottle are wrong. You should really learn to avoid unnecessary pain.

Joan: Oh, you-- you should really learn how to... pick on a supreme being your own size.

Later, at the station. Will is interviewing one of the parents of the victims.

Will: Go right in here.

Mrs. Kerr: Ok.

Will: I'm, uh, sorry you have to be here, Mrs. Kerr, but we need to interview everyone involved.

Mrs. Kerr: It's all right. If I can help put that man away.

Will: Ok, now. (he turns on a tape recorder)

Mrs. Kerr: I was with my kids. They love the farmers market. Amy is 3, and my little one Jill just started talking. I was pushing her through the market, and she was pointing, saying "apple. Red apple." (She starts to cry) I'm ok. Thanks. She was pointing and laughing. And that's when I heard the screeching of the tires. I didn't have any time. I turned around, and I saw the car. I had to get out of the way. I was holding Amy's hand, but the stroller, it tipped. I tried to pull it, but it tipped... and he ran over her. He didn't even slow down. He ran right over my baby. (Sobbing)

Will reaches out and turns off the recorders off recorder

Later in the evening. Helen is sitting in the kitchen and Will comes in.

Helen: Do you want me to heat up some dinner for you?

Will: No, thanks. I ate something chicken-related at the station.

Helen: Oh. (Will points out the sticker on her shirt) I gave blood. They put a sticker on you, you forget to take it off, it looks like you're cracking.

Will: That was good of you.

Helen: Any more casualties?

Will: 6 isn't enough? Oh, I hate the ones where there's no bad guy.

Helen: There's not?

Will: Good citizen. Conscientious objector. Sat out Korea on principle. Married 40 years. [Drops ice in glass] He hit the wrong pedal.

Helen: He shouldn't have been driving.

Will: Andy baker shouldn't have been driving. You're the one who said we're not gonna sue a stupid kid for making a mistake.

Helen: I wasn't wrong. I'm just saying.

Will: Brings it all up again, doesn't it?

Helen: Yeah. It travels all 2 inches above the surface. The thing is... Kevin's still here, and he's doing ok. [Clicks glasses]

Will: That's just luck.

Helen: I don't believe in luck.

Will: That's all I believe in.

Helen: What are you, Chinese?

Will: I'm a man with a paralyzed son.

Helen: Gee... what am I?

Will: You're a woman. We don't understand what makes you tick.

Helen: The heart, stupid. You understand anatomy.

The next morning, Helen teaches her first art class after the art show.

Helen: Good morning, heh, everyone. Um... let's begin with some free drawing. 5 minutes worth, I guess.

Iris: Slammin' show, Mrs. Girardi.

Helen: Um, thank you.

Adam: That critic is a wipe, yo.

Helen: Um... so, you read the review? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Well, he's just doing his job, I guess.

Adam: He wrote that Rossetti was an impressionist.

Iris: Which is like saying Monet was a pre-Raphaelite.

Helen: Really? He wrote that?

Adam: Yeah. He's a total poser, Mrs. G. The establishment press is, like, totally whack.

Iris: Look at Manet, Lautrec, Van Gogh.

Adam: Yeah. Critics have this, like, you know, great tradition of being totally clueless.

Helen: That's true, isn't it?

Helen: But... our job as artists is to press on, continue creating, 'cause that's who we are. Um, even if some...critic does squash you like a bug. [Chuckles] That's who we are.

Later, in the stair well of the school. Adam and Grace as sitting and with Joan. Iris is there to be with Adam. Joans foot is in a cast and she is uncomfortable with sitting on stairs.

Grace: Let me tell you what I put in place. First order of business: Clear up old business. I asked Friedman to put his nerd cells to use... ok, he's gonna hack in and destroy the photo.

Adam: He knows how to replace your body with Christy Brinkley's.

Iris: Pre-babies, like early eighties.

Grace: Now all we have to do is narrow down our course of action. Rove is against physical violence, but I overrode him.

Joan puts her foot on Adams knee (she is sitting across from him, this makes her leg straight. Iris doesnt like this AT ALL)

Adam: Yeah, apparently, it's like the U.N. Her vote counts for more.

Grace: Here are my ideas, in order of inspiration. A--whoopee cushion. Not evolved, but always effective. B--water balloons on the morning bus. Bad hair all day. C--the classic trip-and-fall with loaded trays in the cafeteria. D--gum in the seat. E--

Joan: wait, wait, wait, wait. You're losing me.

Grace: Retribution-- the oldest profession.

Joan: I thought that was farming.

Grace: (Sighs) Listen to me, don't whimp.

Joan: Hey! I'm injured, I'm tired, and I don't know if I can pull this off.

Iris: The beauty part, Joan, is that your friends do it for you.

Joan: I'm your friend?

Iris: You're A's friend. I'm about "A."

Joan: Do you have to talk? Is there, like, an off switch?

Adam: (To Iris) She's joking.

Iris: Yeah. Ring ring! That's my life calling.

(Iris goes.)

Joan: (Defending herself to Adam) It's just her voice.

Grace: Yeah, good luck with that. (Kind of sarcastic, pointing out Joan's lie)

Joan: It is!

Adam and Iris get up and leave Joan sitting on the steps alone.

Joan joins the band again.

She is just banging away. She looks upset, this seems to be good therapy.

The band is all out of sync, then the conductor says stop, Joan doesnt notice and keeps playing for a few more beats.


Conductor: All right. Hold up, everybody. (To Joan) Let's be honest now. Have you ever played drums before?

Joan: No.

Conductor: Then why are you here?

Joan: I really want to be in the band.

After practice, Joan goes to talk to the unpopular girl with the hat.

Girl: Hey.

Joan: Hey, what are you doing after school?

Girl: Oh, I have my other band practice.

Joan: You're in another marching band?

Girl: No, it's rock. Well, it's alternative. There's not really a name for it.

Joan: So, you play music for fun?

Girl: Is there another way to do it?

Joan: Yeah, but 2 bands? I mean, I can't even do one load of laundry.

Girl: Well, you know, it's pretty easy when you're the school piÑata. (Joan gives her a puzzled look) Getting dumped on is like fossil fuel. I can't hit back, so I play music.

Joan: Why can't you hit back?

Girl: I'm not allowed. I'm Quaker.

Joan: Oh. Wait, like oatmeal?

Girl: Like weird outfits, like Richard Nixon.

Joan: Is god in that?

Girl: Sure.

Joan: So god kind of tells you, you can't hit back?

Girl: Yeah. Uh... I don't... I don't always understand why he wants me to do the things that he wants, but yeah.

Joan: (whispering) Have you ever seen him?

Girl: No. Ha ha ha. Have you? What are you, catholic?

Joan: No. My parents are. I was baptized, but--but I'm nothing.

Girl: But you-- you've seen god?

Joan: I didn't say that.

Girl: Um, any--any time you want to talk about--

Joan: oh, I don't.

Girl: Ok. Yeah.

Joan: Ok. Um, I'll see you later.

Girl: Ok. Bye.

Another commercial break. We come back at the hospital. The 74 Year old man is sitting by the window of his room. Will comes in.

Will: looks like you're all set to go. Mr. Hansen?

Mr. Hansen: How can I just leave?

Will: I explained it to you. We're not pressing charges at this time.

Mr. Hansen: I know you did. I'm not senile, for god's sake. All I can say is, how can I go home after what I did?

Will: You feel bad. I understand. It would be simple if that was enough, but 6 people are dead, their families changed forever, and no amount of remorse or apology can change that. Now, all you can do is walk out of here and try to face the rest of your life. [Sobbing]

Around the same time at the High School, Joan is trying to make her way to the end of the hall. Just as she makes it, Adam comes running up.

Adam: Jane, there's something you should know.

Joan: Yeah, yeah, you're all about baby voice. Yeah, I get it, ok? I swear on my honour to tolerate it, but only for you.

Adam: No, no, no. The act of revenge, it's big.

Joan: I didn't do anything.

Adam: It's Friedman, ok, the hired hit. He hacked into Angela's diaries, Spam e-mail, now she's hunting him down like a wild animal.

Joan: Ok?

Adam: He's hiding out in the cafeteria. Come on.

Joan sighs and turns around. She now has to try to get all the way back down the hall.

In the Cafeteria, Friedman is sitting alone at a table. Iris and Grace are sitting not far away and Adam and Joan come in.

Grace: This is gonna be better than a million love letters.

Angela comes over and starts yelling at Friedman.

Angela: What is wrong with you?

Friedman: What?

Angela: You made my personal and private thoughts a public spectacle.

Friedman: You mess with scientists, my friend, you're gonna get science.

Angela: (Tries to hit him) You freak, I want to kill you!

Friedman: Le petite mort. The little death. I have some conversational French in my arsenal.

Angela: (to the other girl who was with her in the locker room) Laurie, do you know what they did?

Laurie: I know you said my hair's dyed. It's not, it's highlighted.

Iris stands up and starts to read.

Iris: From the diary of Angela nobody. "My breasts-- I've obsessed about them, wanting them to grow enough to make a c-cup by prom. But today I hate them. I hate my breasts, because today my mom told me she has breast cancer. I'm so scared I can't--

Joan: stop. (she rips the paper out of her hand) Just stop.

That evening. Will and Helen are trying to get go to bed.

Helen: Ordinarily, I'd give you a back rub, but I'm afraid my callused hands might turn dada into doo-doo.

Will: So we've moved on from the review.

Helen: Oh, yeah.

Will: I, uh, did a bad thing today.

Helen: Tell me.

Will: I made that little old man feel guilty for killing people.

Helen: He didn't feel guilty enough?

Will: Not for me.

Helen: You needed revenge?

Will: For a baby in a stroller? I kind of did.

Helen: God forgives it.

Will: God?

Helen: The universe, Whatever.

Will: (Sighs) I needed to hurt him.

Helen: More than he was already hurt?

Will: Yeah. Am I going to hell?

Helen: You don't believe in hell.

Will: I believe in someplace... where you aren't.

Helen: There's no place like that.

Joan making a sandwich, its late and she is wearing Pjs and slippers. The door bell rings and she hobbles to the door on her crutch. She forgets about them half way through and hops over to the door. Its Adam.

Joan: (Sighs) Adam. It's late.

Adam: It is?

Joan: Heh, yeah. Come in. (Joan groaning) Are you cold? You want something to eat?

Adam: Uh... I want to talk. So, does it, like, hurt? (talking about her foot)

Joan: Not so bad anymore. You get used to it.

Adam: Did you know about Angela's mother?

Joan: (Sighs) No. Did you?

Adam: No. We're both behind this whole thing.

Joan: No. Friedman was.

Adam: Jane, we were.

Joan: Yeah. We'll apologize. I mean, that's enough, right?

Adam: I don't know. Wow, this is the most awesome sandwich I have ever seen.

Joan: Have it. Heh. Bored with it already. Too much chewing.

Adam: I'm not hungry.

Joan: Hmm. So why are you here?

Adam: Iris is a good person.

Joan: (Whining) I know. It--ahem--it's just that her voice... drives me crazy. Heh heh.

Adam: It's her real voice. It drives me crazy, too.

Joan: (there is a long pause. Adam takes off her slipper He is being very gentle and protective of her sore foot, but he is avoiding her eyes) But you love her?

Adam: I--I like her a lot.

Joan: And you want me to like her, too?

Adam: No. But I want you to like me.

Joan: (another long pause, where Joan thinks about what Adam just said) Adam, I don't just like you.

Adam: Heh. Yeah. Yeah, me, too. (He gently puts the slipper back on her foot) Good night, Jane.

Adam leaves and Joan turns her head to her face is in profile of the camera.. There is a single tear running down her cheek.

Then we see Adam walk away and we fade to black on No Bad Guy.

The end.

Page créée & Ecrit par orelye

Kikavu ?

Au total, 3 membres ont visionné cet épisode !

Fuffy 
08.11.2018 vers 22h

Annaelle19 
19.02.2018 vers 14h

ShanInXYZ 
Date inconnue

Vu sur BetaSeries

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pretty31, Hier à 21:32

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et un nouveau thème pour HypnoClap, le quartier du cinéma, en vote dans les Préférences ! Avec de nombreux autres thèmes qui attendent vos votes

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et Ally McBeal aussi

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